Does wearing our hair in its natural state come with insecurities? Does it make us feel less than a woman, or too bold? Do we like wearing it? Do we feel comfortable and CONFIDENT wearing it, whether its in a twist out or a massive fro’? Do we care if our man likes it? If our job likes it?
Whats the deal with all this… hair?
I was on a double date a couple weeks ago with a good friend of mine and her boyfriend, and the topic of natural hair came up. Now, my friend and I are both naturalista’s and loving it, so of course when the boys decided to bring this up, our antenna’s went up. “You know, I just think Natural Hair looks very… natural. Sometimes it can look unkept” says her boyfriend. Humph.
“Yes, I met Lizz when she had her hair straight. Thats how she got me.” said my date. Humphhhhhh.
Now, they of course were being super playful… but you know how the saying goes. Theres always a little bit of truth to every “JK.”
No honestly…My friend and I of course laughed it off. Guys were just being guys, being silly. No big deal. But the question popped into my head of, not only do guys REALLY like natural hair, but is my natural hair pretty enough? Is it curly enough? Is it beautiful enough?
(my three day old wash and go) – kinks and all! 😉
I think as naturals, its “natural” for us to desire another hair type, or curl type or pattern. For me, when I first started my natural hair journey, I wanted to be a 3c curl type so bad. I adored the loose curls and perfectly defined coils that I thought every natural just HAD to have. I didn’t understand why, when I would do my wash and go’s, they didn’t look very curly, or why my curl pattern would be different in different parts of my hair.
I thought every single strand, curl and coil on my head had to be perfect.
I didn’t understand why, when I used certain hair products that were supposed to have “strong hold” or give me “perfect curls”, that I wasn’t looking like these curly girls. And the answer was simple… their hair is not my hair. And my hair is not theirs.
Me this past weekend on my wash day! Tried some new products. Will do a wash regimen post later this week. 🙂
Wearing your hair in its natural state isn’t some new phenomenon, or a “new” way to wear your hair. Its how you were born. You don’t “go natural”… you “return” to natural.
Every journey, regardless of what type of journey whether it has to do with weight loss, or overall improving your performance at a certain task or lifestyle, will include ups and downs. It will include kinks, that you may have to work out (excuse the pun) and insecurities and differences you have to overcome. But thats what makes it a journey. And a beautiful one at that.
This post is not some step by step method to overcoming insecurities, or how to make your natural hair prettier… but just to give us some encouragement and inspiration! STOP TRYING TO MAKE YOUR HAIR LOOK LIKE EVERYONE ELSES. Trust me, there is no product out there that will do such. Your hair is your hair, and for that reason, you should love it and love yourself.
What do you love about your natural hair? What makes it stand out, and set apart from other naturalista’s?
Share your thoughts and comments below!
Always remember: You are Fearfully, Wonderfully and “Beautifully mane.”
Beautifully Mane 
I love this post! For the first time I feel as if I’m not alone with my view on going back natural rather than simply becoming natural.
Great post, I am sure most women can relate to. In life I believe it’s about having that self confidence first……then it doesn’t really matter what someone else thinks. Confidence will make people forget about hair, weight or anything else and have them thinking about how they can have that same type of confidence within themselves.
I think us natural girls kind of get caught in our own hair sometimes. I do it myself. I might see a pic on twitter or instagram and say “I wish my hair could do that” or “I wish I had curls like those”. All hair is not the same whether relaxed or natural.